September 12, 2011

Ghostly

At 3:15am woke up and from then started urine therapy something I have stopped several months ago due to the appearance of a lump near neck which the doctors are unable to conclude on a diagnosis. I think in some ways the practice of urine therapy (aka shivambu) may have triggered this morning experience in some ways.

6am still awake unable to sleep closed eyes and relaxed waiting for sleep. I found myself in the living room with my nephew sitting down on the sofa and immediately realize I am dreaming. I'm talking to him but he is being rather annoying - I tell him that I love him and that he is so adorable making him blush like a girl which silences him.

The scene warps into darkness - suddenly I feel a sensation in the rectum, felt like a finger or a rod sticking up. Very painful and uncomfortable. I'm aware of my bedroom at this stage and that I'm back in bed sleeping on the front side. I turn around on my back and the sensation subsides but travels up to the tailbone and rattles. I wonder if I should've remained still.

Close eyes and start to see through my eyelids faces slightly forming on ceiling.

Open eyes and close them again. This time a glowing line forming a man appears, he seems to be on top vibrating or rocking vigorously to the rhythm of that wave sensation almost as if he is causing it. Open eyes one more time and feel the shaking is a deep inner sensation slightly moving outwards. Close eyes again his form still visible I reach out with my arms but they go through him passing by to the window my hands look so vivid. I rocket out the window flying by little odd buildings that look like creatures, living yet made out of solid inanimate material. I soar up high across a lot of dome shaped buildings.

As I'm flying there is an ecstatic feeling of incomprehensible joy, I feel as though I have been set free. I feel like singing and the song that comes to mind is from a bollywood movie. Song called Papa kehte hain. The inner voice is singing this song so loud I am briefly abrupted thinking it can be heard in the physical which makes me return slowly.

Back in again enter a dream sequence where in my house I see a ghost and start to feel comfortable around it initially after some fear mounts on the surface. I could feel the others are present and get this sense that this is some kind of dream test that I have yet to face the real challenge in the physical focus. Aware of the body with a feeling of lurking presence, worried about what I'll see when I open eyes - not sure about seeing ghosts just yet.

Open eyes slowly, a gust of wind gushes through my ears, nose and head area as though something roaring within me which took me by suprise.

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