September 22, 2010

Fire Escape Dream

I'm in a relative's house - there are other relatives around me and people I've never met. My host is telling me to help myself to some of the food he cooked. I see my ex and start to feel a mix of emotions, awkward and happy at the same time. He approaches me and tells me that I should try the sweet and savoury pudding as I will enjoy it more. It seems he knows that I've stopped eating animal products. I want to say something to him but the presence of my mum and other relatives are making the situation even more awkward.

I help myself to some food as my ex walks away. Old emotions are resurfacing and resulting in feeling regret and guilt. There are some kids playing around in a bedroom - I find a shelf and grab some music albums realizing they belong to my ex. I can't help but smile as I rummage through his things but slyly put them back before he catches me. I know he's somewhere in the house keeping his distance.

Mum and eldest sister are calling out to me telling me to get my nephew R since we're leaving. I see R amongst the kids, holding his hand together we're walking down a long corridor. There is a girl about 8 years old walking beside us seeing us off. We walk inside another kitchen set on fire. The flames are blue. There's an exit door but it would be difficult to get through there - a hundred thoughts are running through my head in that one instant which is why I am so confused about what to do. We're back in the corridor, I'm shouting out that there's a fire in the house but nobody hears me. Panic sets in as the fire rages.

I look at my nephew - he is priority if there is anything I do I must take him out safe to his mother. I tell the girl that she has to go and tell everyone else that there's a fire and for them to try and escape. I'm sad that I couldn't just take her with me or let her take my nephew to safety.

I hold his hand and make him run with me through another doorway until we are outside. I'm looking for his mum until I catch a glimpse of some relatives and tell them to call the fire brigade while I go back to help the rest. They inform me that there are fires starting like this in other places.

As I run back to the house the dream starts to fade.

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